Thank you for the warm introduction and for having me as your guest on the Papahood podcast. It's a pleasure to be here and share my thoughts on fatherhood.
As a father, I have learned many lessons along the way, but if I had to choose the toughest one, it would be realising the importance of being present and actively involved in my children's lives. While my wife took on a significant role in their upbringing, I understood that my presence and engagement mattered greatly. Getting caught up in work and other responsibilities is easy, but spending quality time with my children and being there for them emotionally and physically was crucial.
Regarding favourite fatherhood memories, it isn’t easy to pick just one. However, my most cherished memories are those filled with love, sharing, and caring within our family. I prioritise creating a warm, nurturing environment where everyone feels supported and connected.
My father taught me the importance of being non-partial and fostering a sense of togetherness within the family. He was a hardworking, loving, and caring dad, and I tried to emulate those qualities in my fatherhood journey. Building solid bonds, being there for my children mentally and physically, and fostering a close-knit family have been guiding principles for me.
Regarding the changing role of fathers, today's fathers face unique challenges and pressures. Fathers must balance work and family life in a fast-paced and demanding world. The stress and responsibilities can be overwhelming, but prioritising spending quality time with children, building their confidence, and being a source of support and understanding is crucial. In an era where children face various pressures, including peer pressure and technological distractions, parents must create an environment where children feel comfortable and safe, fostering open communication and trust.
While it is true that both parents working can create additional challenges, it's possible to find a balance. Quality time spent with children, even if it's just an hour a day, can make a significant difference. It's essential to prioritise the emotional well-being of children and create opportunities for family togetherness, away from the distractions of technology and work-related stress.
The golden rule of fatherhood is to spread love and ensure that children feel valued and appreciated. Showing unconditional love, being supportive through successes and failures, and avoiding favouritism within the family is essential to being a good father.
As for my sons who have grown into fathers, I am proud of them and how they have embraced fatherhood. They have brought honour and pride to our family, and I hope they continue excelling in their roles as a father.
When it comes to choosing between fatherhood and grand-fatherhood, it's a tough decision. I enjoyed every moment of being a father, but being a grandfather has brought a new level of joy and energy into my life. Interacting with my grandchildren, playing games, singing songs, and creating special memories together has been a delightful experience. Grandparenthood keeps me young at heart and brings a different kind of fulfilment.
In terms of advice to young dads today, keep life simple and prioritise the emotional well-being of your children. Despite the challenges and complications of the modern world, creating a loving and caring home environment is crucial. Taking the time to understand and support your child, being there for them physically and emotionally, and making them feel safe and valued are the keys to successful fatherhood. Show them abundant love and care, and don't hesitate to hug them whenever needed. Creating a home filled with loving and positive memories is essential for their growth and happiness.
As for being anxious for your children, I am not anxious because I have confidence in the strong foundation and upbringing you all received. I see you working hard and overcoming challenges, and you will continue to do so in the future. You're doing a fabulous job, and I applaud you for it.
Apart from my own father, who significantly influenced me, I would like to nominate my childhood friend Clifford Bonjour. He has been an impressive father figure and has had a positive impact on my life.
Well said!!